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Advantage Number 11.

Do you remember when we listed Giles Hancock’s 10 advantages of BBO? Well, you should as it was only yesterday! That list was though incomplete. There is an 11^th one. …which brings us back to the questions you were given overnight. With the clocks going back, you had an extra hour to work out the answers!

The first one should have been quite easy. Complete the following sentence:

“Partner’s role in life is to….” and the answer is “disappoint”. Only on a very special birthday will you be given the dummy of your dreams. As we saw yesterday, that “dream dummy” can come in various shapes and strengths. With that sobering thought in mind (and it must have been my partner’s special birthday recently..and maybe mine too!), let’s address this deal:

 

2 was a Michaels Cue-Bid promising at least 5 spades and at least 5 cards in a minor….weak or strong. With a 5-5 spade fit, no losers in the opponents’ suit and at worst a 5-3 fit in partner’s minor, 4 should have been a great contract even if partner was very weak. There could only be 4 losers on all but an extremely bad day..and if partner had no honours, then then the opponents must be cold for 4.

It was not your special birthday because when we move across to your partner’s side of the table, this was the auction he saw from the North seat:

West           North          East            South

                                                          1

Pass            2              3            4

All Pass               

Are you starting to get worried? Which was the correct auction? The one you saw, of course! We believe there was a distraction at your partner’s end. Remember, yesterday, a couple of Giles’ top reasons for playing on-line:

  “The cat can sit on my lap.

    I can ask the dog for advice.   Or the goldfish.”

We know North does not have a goldfish but it is possible that the canine advice was not up to scratch!

 

Not only had partner not got the right opener (strangely as it may seem, for some of us, this is one disadvantage of on-line bridge..honestly!) but he seemed to be happy to play in spades despite agreeing hearts. Presumably, with such a monster hand, he or his advisor did not want to stretch to the 5 level.

The disappointment was too much as declarer lost trump control to be down 5 in a contract in which he had such great expectations. Partner’s role fulfilled admirably!

As you can deduce, the role of being Secretary of New Zealand Bridge can be very stressful at times. It is very unkind to blame this disaster on doggy advice. Like Douglas Russell’s superbly talented cat, Biritch, this dog named Bryn would have done far far better than his master! No, Alister managed this all on his own!

Bryn..and his master's hand!

Yet, here we can find the 11^th advantage of playing on-line: you cannot see partner’s face when you table your dummy!

More from on-line Bridge

It’s pretty social playing on-line bridge…or it can be if you chat

 to your partner                                      …after the hands!...or

 to opponents or the whole Tournament… during hands!

Too much chat would of course upset directors like Patrick Carter or Julie Atkinson as it can slow the play down.

However, Patrick himself can produce some good comments too like to players calling the director because their computer was frozen. This helpful advice from Patrick:

“Well, close the window then!”

"Where's the Drinks Trolley?"

You might call this next phrase as a kind of lament, a wish for days of live bridge as she calls for the “drinks trolley to be rolled out” around 8pm. For those of you who do not play at the Wellington Bridge Club, the trolley is a regular occurrence at the club.

The on-line request comes regularly from “Jenstar” who we can reveal as Jenny Delany.

Despite the request for an 8pm trolley, I am reliably informed that the trolley appears after the supper break some 45 minutes later..and that the first to use this service each night is “Jenstar” who will have her regular “charddy”.

 Perhaps, playing on-line, “Jenstar” does not have to wait until 8pm for her own personal trolley to appear?

Some on-line "No-Nos"

One error players make is to address the whole Tournament rather than their table. Thanks, John, for telling us all the details of your system. It’s just as well everyone does not make that same mistake. Other advice not to tell the “whole world” is that your partner should have led a trump… handy advice for those who are a little slow in playing the board!

Please, please do not swear on-line. Automatic sin-binning as one of Julie and Patrick’s assistant directors found out, though the punishment seems only to be handed out if you are female!

Now, talking of directing, there’s none better than Julie or Patrick but it can take its toll. They put in a lot of effort at and away from the bridge table. So, when I received no reply from Patrick to a bidding problem I sent for this daily feature, I tried Julie…and got an answer within milli-seconds. Says something about what we men already know or are told…something to do with multi-tasking...except I rather forgot Julie was multi-tasking! She is directing just like Patrick.

It seems a very opportune moment to insert a picture of a
happy Julie and Patrick...and since their regular teammates,
Barry Jones and Jenny Millington, were also there and happy,
they are included as well.

“Daring, tactless…or plain stupid” are some terms which come to mind for even thinking of printing the above piece!

When we were still playing bridge (not much more than 2 weeks ago)

It is certainly time to change the subject…and we can revert to what wonders a combination of the English language and a small slip of one’s hand on the keyboard can produce.

These occurred in the last few weeks:

Referring to the Supplementary Regulations for an upcoming major New Zealand event, the director emailed:

“And here’s the daft Supplementary Regulations” (please insert an “r” unless you think he really meant it!)

Meanwhile, we all look up to the Board of New Zealand Bridge. They put a lot of voluntary time and effort into trying to make our game better. However, in one of the more reverent comments sent to a Board member in recent weeks, came the following from the recently named “stressful Secretary” of New Zealand Bridge. A very short email, though no more need be said:

“A god call, Karen”

You must know now that you are in just the best hands when it comes to the administration of our game. ..but you knew that without my telling you, even with a second “o” inserted.

Time to get back to some bridge. (“Did I hear a chorus of “at lasts”?)

 

The opposition have forced themselves up to 3. 3 was a game try probably spades as trumps and looked for help in diamonds. North provided no help.

Your partner led the A, taking your queen. They then followed with K and J (South has followed to two diamonds and is likely to play a third.) Which two discards do you make?

See you tomorrow.

Richard Solomon

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